When parents separate or divorce, one of the most difficult decisions they face is determining what arrangements serve the children’s best interests. Increasingly, a ‘nesting arrangement’ is a discussed option. In this setup the child remains in the family home while the parents take turns living there, rotating in and out. Whilst this approach may seem like an ideal way to provide stability for the children, it can also present significant challenges and so parents need to carefully consider whether it is the right arrangement for the children. Advantages of nesting arrangements 1. Stability and familiarity One of the primary benefits of a nesting arrangement is that it allows the children to remain in a familiar environment. By staying in the same home they can continue attending the same school, maintain their routine, and stay connected to their friends and community. This consistency can be especially beneficial for younger children who may struggle with frequent transitions between two different households. 2. Minimal disruption Traditional custody arrangements often require children to pack up and move between two homes which can be stressful and exhausting. A nesting arrangement eliminates this constant back and forth, reducing anxiety and allowing the children to focus on their daily life rather than the logistics of custody exchanges. 3. Gradual adjustment Transitioning from a two-parent to a sole parent household can be difficult. A nesting arrangement can serve as a temporary solution that eases the children into the new family dynamic and arrangements. This may be particularly helpful in the early stages of divorce when emotions are high, and both parents are working through the legal and emotional complexities of co-parenting. 4. Encourages co-parenting cooperation A nesting arrangement requires a high level of cooperation and communication between parents. When successful, it can foster a spirit of teamwork and shared responsibility, showing the children that both parents are committed to their well-being despite separation. Disadvantages of nesting arrangements 1. Instability and confusion While nesting is designed to provide stability, it can have the opposite effect if not managed properly. Children may find it confusing to see their parents alternating in and out of the home as it can blur the lines of separation. Without clear boundaries they might develop false hopes of reconciliation or struggle to adjust to the reality of their parents living apart. 2. Emotional and psychological impact The success of nesting depends on the emotional maturity of both parents. If conflict, resentment, or tension persists between them, the children may be exposed to further and ongoing stress. Additionally, this type of arrangement can sometimes prevent children from fully adapting to the new family structure, delaying their emotional adjustment to their parents’ separation. 3. Costly A major drawback of a nesting arrangement is that it often requires parents to maintain three separate residences: the family home for the children, and two additional homes or living arrangements for each parent. This can be financially draining and/ or logistically complex. Even if parents choose to share a separate residence when not in the family home it can be difficult to maintain personal space, privacy and independence. 4. Parental tension Sharing a home even on a rotating basis, requires parents to continue managing household duties, expenses and decision making. If boundaries are not clearly established disagreements over bills, cleanliness and household management can create additional conflict which may impact on the children. 5. Sustainability Nesting arrangements are often best suited as a short-term solution rather than a permanent custody plan. Overtime, as parents enter new relationships or seek greater independence, maintaining a shared family home can become increasingly impractical. This can lead to additional transitions for the children and may be more disruptive than if a traditional custody plan had been established from the beginning. Summary of nesting arrangements While nesting offers benefits in terms of stability and continuity for the children, it is not a one-size-fits-all solution. Families considering this arrangement should carefully evaluate their ability to co-parent effectively, manage financial and logistical challenges, and ensure that the arrangement serves the long-term well-being of their children. For some families, nesting may work as a temporary transition to help their children adjust to the changes in the family. For others, a more traditional arrangement where each parent maintains their own home, with clear structured parenting time, may ultimately provide greater stability and emotional security for them. Ultimately the best arrangement is one that prioritises the children’s well-being while also considering the emotional, financial and practical realities of both parents. How can Morr & Co help? If you would like to discuss nesting arrangements with an experienced solicitor, our experienced family team will be able to answer any questions you may have. You can contact them by email info@morrlaw.com or by calling 0333 038 9100. Disclaimer Although correct at the time of publication, the contents of this newsletter/blog are intended for general information purposes only and shall not be deemed to be, or constitute, legal advice. We cannot accept responsibility for any loss as a result of acts or omissions taken in respect of this article. Please contact us for the latest legal position. Authored by Lydia Pilati Associate Solicitor Message Tags Insights On this page Contact our team today to find out more get in touch
